The question going round my head at the moment is a simple one – is body positivity easier for some women?
Body positivity is growing in popularity. Especially when it comes to post-baby body’s. There are social media accounts (mine included…) popping up all over the place. Filled with pictures of women who are happy with their body and telling you that you can feel the same way.
Except you might not. Even with all this wonderful inspiration you still don’t seem to be able to shift your beliefs and feel amazing about yourself. I know I didn’t and sometimes still don’t feel that great. Which got me thinking, some of these accounts seemed to have certain elements in common. I couldn’t help looking at these women and thinking “Yes, but you find body positivity easier because…”.
Which made me realise that I think there are some things that do make body positivity easier. And that if they are missing then feeling great about yourself might be more of an uphill battle for you than for others.
So if you are one of those women looking at the body positivity movement and thinking that you just can’t get there, remind yourself that some of those influencers have other characteristics or elements that might make being body positive easier for them than it is for you.
I’ve come up with six elements that I think make it easier to love your body. I’m not saying everyone with these things will love their body. But I do wonder if having one or more of the following will give some women a head start over the rest of us.
#1 – Being pretty
This one seems a little obvious to me but if you are a naturally attractive (in the conventional way) then it’s going to be easier to love your body. We can get fixated on our body’s but that’s not all that makes someone attractive. So if someone has blond hair, beautiful eyes, perfect skin and is pretty too I can’t help but think that this is going to make it a whole lot easier to feel positive about being bigger.
#2 – Being young
I’ve yet to see a 60 year old body positive influencer with the same number of followers that some of the popular accounts have. It seems to me that being young, without wrinkles, lines, dark eyes or grey hair is going to help you feel positive about the way you look. Perhaps, too, youth has a natural energy and enthusiasm that creates a more positive vibe. Whatever it might be, I can’t help thinking that being youthful is an advantage when it comes to being able to embrace your body.
#3 – Having money
One of the biggest challenges for me in my body positivity journey was being broke. I couldn’t afford clothes that fit let alone clothes that were stylish or glamourous. So often it was my clothes making me feel bad, not my body. I also couldn’t afford to use the best beauty products. Buy make up or decent hair care products. All of which made it really hard to look my best. Conversely, if someone has money to spend on their appearance, whether that’s what they wear or how they style their hair, they are likely to feel a lot better about themselves overall and be able to feel positively about their body.
#4 – Being in a loving relationship
There’s one body positive influencer I’ve come across who will post pictures of her and her partner, proudly exclaiming that he loves her body just the way it is. Which is fabulous for her. But I can’t help thinking that it’s easy to feel sexy in a bigger body if you’ve got someone telling you that you are. If, on the otherhand, you are in a relationship (or single) where your partner doesn’t give you compliments, or maybe even criticises you, then your ability to be body confidence is going to be hugely reduced.
#5 – Being thin
This is my second obvious point on the list. Is it easier to be body positive when you are thin? I know there are slim women out there who hate their body but they number far fewer than bigger women who do. We live in a fat-phobic society so it stands to reason that being thinner is going to make it easier to feel confident about your body.
#6 – Not being a mum
There are certain changes that happen after a baby that can really knock a mums confidence, even if she gets back to the same size she was before. Overhangs, stretch marks, loose skin or saggy boobs can all make you feel less comfortable with your body. So perhaps it is easier for women to be body positive before they have kids. Before they have to confront permanent changes that dramatically change your body.
So there you have it, 6 things that I think make body positivity easier
I do just want to be clear, I’m not criticising or dismissing some of the body positive influencers out there. I think they spread an amazing message and one we all need to hear. But I do think we need to be realistic on how easy it is for some of us to love our bodies. Being told we should happily accept the way we are is harder when some of the elements above might be missing.
If you struggle being body positive now you’re a mum why not start your body positivity journey by joining my mini-challenge on learning to love your post-baby body? It’s five days and you’ll be able to get practical advice on how you can start to embrace your body and feel positive about yourself.